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I can’t tell you how many women have asked me the same question: “Why do I only seem to EVER meet guys that are completely the wrong age for me?”
Or to put it more simply (as one client asked me): “Where are all the great, single, 40-year old men hiding??”
Like it or not, we all know that age is a factor in dating. But so many people waste years moaning about where they are in life (I’m too old, I’m too young…) instead of doing something about it.
Often it’s not about age at all. We use that as our crutch, when really, if we’re truly honest with ourselves, maybe we just aren’t being pro-active enough right now and investing in the CRUCIAL STRATEGIES that would bring us closer to finding love.
So in this week’s video, I’m going to share some down-to-earth, PRACTICAL tips for finding a guy no matter what age you are
Links at the End:
Are you good enough? https://youtu.be/YgPK4lqMq0Y
2 ways to approach a guy: https://youtu.be/O8dZEZGBIEo
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I came to watch laugh at people giving advice about relationships as are more than less often hilarious and not so good. But I'm actually impressed. Not bad at all!
I stopped dating 5 years ago and I have being happily single since. But if I decide to ever date again (hope no) I will sure check out your videos ;)
Here's some advice for you women from my male prespective as to why most intelligent men with a high value, run the other direction or just pump and dump you. To us men we see today's modern women as a complete waste of time and energy. If you are lucky enough to find a girl you really like, she then begins to "test" you or play mind games instead of being who she really is on the inside. Also, today's women will do their best to leave a good hearted man that truly loves her, a broken shell of himself. Today's women THINK that they are entitled to a lavish lifestyle and expect a man to do all the heavy lifting in a relationship while she should have her pretty little ass kissed just for being such an amazing creature... Your entitled attitude has us running, because we know once you pop out a kid or 2... You no longer feel"loved" or appreciated or whatever other excuse you want to is, just so you can monkey branch up to the next poor cuckhold to get what you want. If you truly want a good man... Then today's women need to become women worth having.... No.. I'm not some burnt guy or jaded. I go out with beautiful women all the time, but I'm not affraod to put them in their place. I'm not your door mat and I don't play second to noone. Get over yourself and take responsibility for your part on the relationship... Shit, most women can't even cook these days... Men are dying for a real woman who takes pride in herself and supports her man as he tries to become a better version of himself.... Get your head outta your asses.
It's still shock me just how many people do not know about Troplusfix Dating Secrets even though lots of people become badass with women with it. Thanks to my personal pal who told me about this. I've fully get rid of my shyness, and finally get laid with my crush.
I would be interested if a woman got down on her knees and begged forgiveness for all her kind have done, acknowledged the sacrifices men have made, and promised that I would feel nothing but love for the rest of my life. Anything short of that and I'm happy to be mgtow.
Hi there, have you considered Troplusfix Dating Secrets yet? Just do a search engine search. On there you'll discover an awesome guidelines about how exactly you can get laid by hot girl. Why don't you give it a shot? maybe it's going to work for you too.
I'm interested in art. Over 20 years ago, I followed Matthew's advice and took classes that I was interested in because I was interested in the subject, but thought I might meet someone. Back then, 100% of the students in the classes I took were women. I've been teaching art for more than 15 years. In that time, I've had 2 - count them - TWO men in my classes. I've belonged to drawing groups that were 98% women and the men were nice, but not guys I'd date. I've gone on museum tours. Again, mostly women, a few couples, and sometimes a gay man...Can you offer better advice?
Johnny, I agree with you about hanging out where I'm likely to meet men. Matthew's advice was to do things that interest me as a way of meeting men who share my interests. Just saying, I've done it without finding cheese. Online dating is much more productive than pretending to like sports or as someone who doesn't drink or dance, hanging out in bars or clubs.
Jeka Lambert: Stop wasting your life hanging around areas were men aren't and find out and hang where men are.
So you took matthew,s advice 20 years ago and still don't have a man I hope you didn't pay for it. You spent 15 years teaching a class that a total of 2 men took. When do you think you might figure out your wasting your time?
Not certain about the points made but ,if anyone else is searching for how to give a man good pleasure try Magic tactic formula ( search on google ) ? Ive heard some amazing things about it and my mate got amazing results with it.
She can first tske care of her son.a 15 year old son should be her main priority. He's her treasure...she should wait for her son to be settled first then when he's 20 is and up and running then go out when she's sort of single and carefree. Tell her to make a.lidt as to what she brings to the table that way the guy can make s sensible decision
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I’m 57 Married 34 years. Single now I need help ... I just stay to myself intimidated I guess.maybe this info can help. It don’t matter 27 37 57 feels the same where the heart is concerned,? Confidence is more difficult as i get older .. thank you
You told me what I exactly wanted to know Matthew! You're fantastic. Its like you are telling my story. I have been divorced for 4 years now and being active on Dating apps has me the same experience you're speaking about here. :) Am gonna go out and do what i really wanna do. Thank you
Winner of a video, I have been researching "dating advice for women from men" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you ever come across - Honulian Fascination Inveiglement - (do a google search ) ? Ive heard some super things about it and my partner got cool success with it.
I’m in LDR with a much younger man. He is supporting me in what I do and is very mature . What your take on 1:
LDR ( we are planning to move in together when the time is right na we still love each other (no longer 2 years)
2. What do you think of a marriage where a woman is much older than her husband. ?
I wish we have all figured out, but we don’t , not yet, if ever as a relationship is a winding journey not a straight line . Life throws curves and obstacles we need to figure out if we need to jump over or walk around them .
I love the idea of couples’ counselling. I though of it briefly but for a different purpose , to see if we have got enough to thrive in our relationship sort of use that person like a crystal ball 🔮.
You’ve shed a different light on it and I appreciate that. I’m sure we can benefit and learn about our gender roles in our relationship as well. Another reason for the councillor would be the that we are from different cultures. We don’t notice obvious differences that have come up, but want to dig in little deeper to see if the ones we find are complimentary or we need to work on them .
Very well said Adam.
Your story gave me several ideas and guidelines to apply in my relationship. It is already a first counselling session, it is from you .
Thank you for sharing your journey with me and the world. All the best.
Cool it sounds like you already have a plan and a path ahead. That's what I've learned from strong women, the importance of having a direction and goals. Gender roles have changed and now women are more in leadership roles and men are struggling to follow and I believe the problem is trust more than ego. Women need to demonstrate they can lead a man and so our ego doesn't get disturbed women have to also allow men to be men and this can only happen with a LOT of communication and education.
Even if a woman is in charge and doesn't need a man our instincts are always gonna be to give to women and to protect them. That is why men are intimidated cause we ask ourselves: "What can I possibly offer this woman?" It's kinda our own macho way of nurturing and looking after women we love, we want to _give_ to them. And most men think money is the only thing they can give. My girlfriend and I started to see a couples counselor in order to figure it all out and she's been wonderful. In one of the meetings she taught my wife how she has to relax and allow me to man-up and allow me opportunities to earn her trust. I also had to learn to find other ways to provide for her not just by throwing cash at her since she earns more than me.
She also told me that males are creative and energetic so just use that energy and creativity to find other ways to provide for her. So I did, I figured out that not just my girlfriend but all women prize devotion and loyalty above money. So ever since I have been providing my girlfriend with devotion in all kinds of little ways and it serves as a constant reinforcement to her that I'm serious. I help and support her in her career, I take over chores when she's tired, sometimes I just do whatever pops into my head like sneak out of bed early and get her breakfast or just to amuse her (and myself) I do some of the house chores without a shirt just to tease her. Just a whole bunch of little things like that.
Not being able to see our place in a relationship with a strong woman is the #1 reason men are intimidated. That sends a signal that we are beneath women. But also, women need to learn how to lead. Women are now empowered but they don't know what that means, they haven't yet figured out all the new tools and opportunities your gender has. Such as the power to choose the man you want and to create your own standards. You do not depend on a man so now you're free and empowered to choose the one that you want and not because you need one. This intimidates men because it means we have to step up and actually work at living up to women's standards and if we want a chance with a woman we have to follow her rules.
But most women don't bother making the rules clear or they're not aware that being in charge means making the rules and that only further confuses guys. In our sessions with our counselor my girlfriend and I have talked about what her expectations and standards are and how I'm gonna live up to them and also where my limits are and how I can fix it if I screw up. It is soooooo much easier and stress-free when I know what I'm supposed to do and specially when I have a lot of room to stand out from other men and use my masculine instincts. This allows most women to relax having a man in her house so she can fall back on her own feminine instincts and together balance each other out. When I'm taking charge of things for her she becomes very nurturing and relaxed. She enjoys it when I take charge even though she can do it herself and while I'm at the wheel she feels free to act more feminine and nurturing and that in turn energizes me and motivates me to be more devoted to her.
But just know that as a woman you can't stay in that comfortable passenger seat forever. As a strong woman you are in charge and if you relax for too long a guy can get confused and our roles will get blurred and cause friction. It's like you said, there needs to be a job performance review periodically in order to stay on track so a man knows his place and a woman knows hers. That's how you maintain stability. A easy way to say what our gender roles are is like our counselor said: Woman is the Queen and the man is her knight.
Thank you Adam for your insightful comment .
I can relate closely to your girlfriend. I am a strong woman as well. My boyfriend knows I don’t need him, but I want him if we continue growing together. I don’t need to be supported by a man and I will be earning more when we are together.
I realize that many men may be intimidated by strong independent women not being able to see his place in the relationship. Men don’t like to be lead by a women as that may hurt their ego. That is a society influence and traditions from the past where women were to bare children and serve the husband.
If a woman truly loves her man she won’t be egotistical and will not go above him showing that he is inferior to her education wise or financially.
We come from different backgrounds of education and culture . I realize and accept him with the greatness he possesses and learn how to handle his flaws . Open Communication is very important.
I am asking difficult questions each and every day opening an opportunity to be asked as well .
My relationship is new in comparison to yours .
We have committed to each other and have a great hope to be together
, but everything is on day by day . Week by week basis but planning our future together. Each day we plan and review or relationship. It is like a job performance review.
We are going to meet in 10 days for several weeks . We will be meeting every few months until I graduate from my program. Hopefully we will be still together. He will move in with me for some time . By then we will have known each other for 2.5 years . At that point we will reach a decision whether we want to stay as a couple or go separate ways .
Is it an easy process?
It’s not but it may work. We believe we have a great chance for what everyone wants in life which is true long lasting love . We believe we’ve got what it takes to create a successful relationship.
Thank you for your story Adam. Congratulations on your successful relationship! All the best !🤟🏽🤞🏾
Distance relationships are very tricky, as a guy I can tell you it is much easier to support a woman from a distance when we don't have to be there with her in the thick of it. Not so easy when we are side by side with the woman we love toughing out it in the trenches. My girlfriend is also older than me, she's a strong and independent woman in the true sense of the words because she has a strong career, she earns more than average men, and doesn't really need a man in her life. I still fell in love with her and despite all that I took the leap forward to try my luck with her. She accepted me though not without first putting me to her own little test to see if I was sincere or just bullshiting her.
At first I was way below her standards but since she gave me a change I have been working to improve myself and live up to her expectations, since she saw that I was trying she also helped by by doing what very few women do: Actually talking to me and telling me what she expects from me instead of leaving it all for me to guess.
we have been dating for 2 years now and all this time we have gotten to know each other, she finally asked me if I was ok with moving in with her (she owns her own house) in case I insecure about it (which I was). After thinking about it for a bit I decided to just go for it and here I am. Best choice I ever made. But I could never have made this choice if I didn't know her so intimately to begin with. Women like her can be intimidating as hell for a man. I had to learn to trust her as much as she has to learn to trust me. I had to know she wasn't just gonna use me since she doesn't need me or that she wasn't going to emasculate me or degrade me in the eyes of the world whenever I screwed up and made her mad.
She's almost 10 years older than me so I don't think age matters. But what does matter is knowing each other and when your in a long distance relationships that could turn into a problem.
What if you have great chemistry with a guy, and many things in common that even makes you great friends, he displays all the classic signs of being into you, but hes in an unhappy relationship but doesnt seem to be making any moves to leave?
purpleanex well, as we havent had sex, or even touched each other at all in any manner, I find that to be hard to believe but thanks for the verbal battering youre willing to dish out in the name of "help"
Jennifer Walton ...lmfao...he's using you for sex, because you're an easy lay, he has no interest in you as a person, he just makes the right noises to make you think there's "chemistry", you're an idiot.
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hi everyone ,if anyone else wants to discover dating for men try Panlarko Magnetic Dating Planner (do a google search ) ? Ive heard some awesome things about it and my co-worker got cool success with it.
Guys are industrious. If you can play videogames after putting on your make up. Gold. Think about it. Guys 40 plus. The're already on thier path. Thier focused on what they want cause there guna fucking die. Remember all that girl drama shit y'all used to do to ur girls to see if the girl you hated reacts? Do the same thing without the drama but work towards getting that guys attention. Don't be shy he'll notice. If he's a dick about it then he's missing out. Welcome to the world of 80% of guys. P. S. It's not a joy ride.
interesting points ,if anyone else is searching for guide to attracting women try Nevolly Attract Women Nerd (Have a quick look on google cant remember the place now ) ? Ive heard some pretty good things about it and my cousin got great results with it.
I'm 20 and I fettish for older guys. Well, I met a guy on a dating app. He's 40+, I'm kinda liking him cause he's kind and decent but I do feel like he's too old for me. He's even ready to marry me asap but I'm honestly uncertain about my feelings for him. I'm thinking that maybe I'm not really into him and maybe I'm just liking the idea of him being sweet to me. Liking it because I've never been in a relationship before.
I\'m not sure but ,if anyone else trying to find out middle school dating tips try Panlarko Magnetic Dating Planner (should be on google have a look ) ? Ive heard some great things about it and my mate got excellent results with it.
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It's so rare to find valuable advice online. Thank you @matthew for putting an end to younger people's pursuit for a loopholes. I am more than happy to have stopped by your channel.
Seeking for real relationships in South America? https://goo.gl/eDkdCT
Here is dating tips for women:
Don't spread your legs for the player bad boy type
Don't reject good men that ask you out or friend zone them
Do pay for your own meals and drinks
Otherwise us men is not going to date you.
Under normal circumstances I'd 100% agree but for me my training is really intense and I train alone since it's more bodybuilding then doing classes. So I can't really stop for more than 10 seconds to say hi to someone. And of course this takes up a large part of my life so i wish I could be more social but I can't in this case.
And just like the woman you spoke about in the video I get a lot of late 20s early 30s wanting to go out with me with some sort of fantasy or what have you about dating someone older because I'd like to say I keep myself together and take care of myself but that's not what I'm looking for I'm looking for someone who really just wants to spend time with me at some point but I'm not actively thinking about it every day. Keep up the good work it really helpssometimes when things seem really hopeless and dark your videos can really change it around
Diane Brennan ...Men only want you for sex, it's as simple as that. No man wants a relationship with an older woman, some put up with it because of financial restrictions, but if given the choice 9 out 10 mentioned would rather fuck a younger woman (men who are close to your age). The younger men just see you as an easy target, because, who'd want you, therefore you must be desperate, therefore easy lay. It's not rocket science.
Hi Matthew, this was one of your best videos ever I'm 47 I have a 15-year-old son I work full-time I help take care of my parents and dating time is very limited and sometimes it just feels that I just don't have anything to give. But this really helps me think about the things I want to do anyway wonderful advice thank you so much for sharing it it really changed my mind set today
The thing is its easy for men to like me and talk to me. There were lots even before I was still married. Now that I am divorced for 2 years, I still have not dated because I am exhausted of starting all over again, meeting lots of guys and trying to figure out this and that. The thing is, I just really want that ONE TRUE LOVE to appear on my doorstep and tell me "Hey, here I am ready to spend our lifetime together!" Simple, uncomplicated and eternal! :-)))
My name is Sylvia and I am a student in International Marketing in France. I wrote an article on 5 tips to find a boyfriend or girlfriend during christmas time for school. As you have much influence in dating advice, your help would mean the world to me. The recommendations have the objective of bringing a little laughter to the single community :) Let me know what you think and do not hesitate to share the article. Thank you in advance for your help.
I want some advice on 'how to spot a misogynist' early on in dating.
I don't want to start a long term relationship with someone that eventually turns toxic because they secretly hate women. I want to be able to spot the signs early on so that I can avoid this problem.
There are books out there like: 'Men Who Hate Women - The Women Who Love Them' which are helpful, but books take time to read.
This issue of misogyny is not being addressed in online dating advice. It needs to be.
Be the woman that makes him not hate women, then you will have no problems, if you go into something expecting it to fail it will, more than likely so, this is a lesson I think I have come upon recently, if he shows a lack of repect for you in anyway call it out if he responds in a way you don't like, leave immediately and make no apologies btw anime's pretty cool..
I hear that a lot, but then a lonely old age awaits only those who never bothered to get rich when they were young. You can always "buy" a girlfriend when you are a dried up 70-yr old millionaire.
I really hope you get there and achieve the heartless 'great white shark' mentality that you're aiming for, because that's what a player is.
You obviously hate women and that's why you 'play' them. So you can never find a soul mate or share your life with anyone...
Because to do that, you would need to respect someone enough first in order to see them as an equal. So a lonely old age awaits you - which you deserve.
@PatrickAllenNL thank you for the guys perspective. What if they tell you they're busy. and share the reasons with you, but still only contact you every once in awhile. Is he stringing you along? I feel like if hes really interested that he'll make time. True?
How bout this...why are guys such jerks?
Men these days are totally rude, disrespectful, perverts, or totally jerks.
What has happened to the quality of humanity?
There is a handful of decent people, a handful. You know, women bend over backwards, to try to please men, understand men, give them freedom, what have you...but are men doing this? Nope.
I disagree with the premise that a middle aged woman can only date guys their own age or older. There is nothing wrong with dating younger guys even getting married to them if the couple feels like they want to do that. I find that I mostly connect up with guys between 25 and 37 (Y generation or Millennials) over the X generation which is mine. I am 50 myself.
I have been engaged 3 times, to guys who for varying reasons ended up not there any more (first one had a mental breakdown while visiting relatives and later married a very controlling woman which seems to help with his schizophrenia), number 2 was a brittle type 2 diabetic with kidney failure who died, and the third had a secret addiction to teen boys and even though we were in an open relationship where he could be with ADULT men, he could not leave the addition for porn of teen boys aside, and now is in jail. All three of those guys were slightly older than me (8 1/2 years, 2 years, 2 years). My longest and most comfortable relationship was a roommate/friends with benefits type with a guy who was 26 1/2 to 30, while I was just a couple months shy of 42 to 45 1/2.
I just broke up with fiance number 3 in Dec of last year and am moving my life forward, in about a year I am moving to Buffalo to have a real life outside of my work and building my business online. My future junior business partner (he won't be a full biz partner like my ex was) is 27 and a good friend for 4 1/2 years online. Between him, and others up there who will be connecting me up with lots of new people that are more open minded, plus a more liberal state, I plan on really enjoying my life plus scaling up my business to meet my life goals.
So? Do I care that they are from 28 to 43? No. Here is something interesting: "above me they were 2 years to 8 1/2 years older than me and Baby Boomers"- you
So in 30 fucking years that was all you got? That's what you liked? Damn woman that is a bad taste. And see you are complaining again. You are not happy obviously, because else you would not complain so much. This contradiction is strong with this one.
Clearly that was all you paid attention to, because I stated that all the men I was engaged to over a period of 30 years were actually all the generation above me they were 2 years to 8 1/2 years older than me and Baby Boomers.
The reality is that the idea that a person needs to find a mate to spend the rest of their life with is a female way of thinking. A real man doesn't think of those things. A real man would focus on his job, hobbies and hang out with his friends whom he chooses. When you see a men at a speed dating event that usuallyshows that he is pussywiped. He is effeminate and puts the woman above him. The pussywiped male is what women should STAY AWAY FROM. That guy is a weakling. Men are the ones who should not be the ones looking for a mate. Looking for a mate is the woman's job. Why do you think women are the ones doing all kinds of jesters to get a man to recognize her. That's because she is doing what nature designed her to do. Online dating and speed dating is designed for women not for men and these kinds of dating force men to seek a mate like a female so modern dating is not good.
Heather Mimi Wahlquist ...my god that was some clueless bollocks you wrote. You have to laugh when a woman thinks she's knows how men think and feel. The only thing the op go. wrong was that dating sites are useful, they're good for picking up desperate women for sex, just feed them a load rubbish about how you want a serious relationship, and they drop their knickers, easy. Just make sure you have a few on the go at once, then there'll always be one ready to drop.
MGTOW is freedom! 👍
I think, your cultural upbringing is a bit different than ours here in America. To say, "a real man", sounds redundant, or, are you speaking in riddles or crying out for help in some way? The dating style of girls with brown hair, "brunette women", would only tells us a fact about her physical. Your Japanese anime emoticon, a "fake man", coupled with your hostile words about what manhood is not, suggests you might have insecurities that stop you from ever revealing your "real man" self...The evidence to my theory was all supplied by you. The solution: You are clearly sex-starved (and I seriously mean that). And, for silly reasons -we all have em. Shut your brain off, and go to one of those speed dating events and bring the 1st girl that says yes to coming home with you, home, for no other reason than for sex. It'll cure you, I promise. Smiles for miles to you, dear stranger :)
loredelamore shut the fuck up..MGTOW is so incredibly insignificant that 99% of people haven't even heard of it, and even less have been affected by it.
You know there's something wrong with you if you're a grown man telling a 13 year old girl to give up on ever having a happy relationship.
l believe all people should get to men slowly and not rush into a fast relationshipswith men and l believe everyone should be themselves and l believe people should not be dishonest with men and l believe all people should be careful who they date in this world.lisa f
I agree with u. I am from Asia, lived in the west for 10 years. Personally, I find the dating culture of the western world to be highly problematic and disturbing.
In the west, people believe just because 2 people are dating it mean they are now a couple and has made a commitment to each other, thus, a committed relationship. That is very problematic, 2 people are only a couple and in a committed relationship, when they are
2. de facto
3. otherwise mutually decided to be a couple and be in a committed relationship.
As a result, when 2 people decide to start dating, they also infer the idea that they are now officially a couple and in a committed relationship.
This might be alright, if you are for example, dating somebody you know and is friend with, for over 1 or 2 year. But if it is e.g. somebody you just met in a bar, you can see why this dating culture is highly disturbing.
This is also part of the reason, in the west, there is a higher ratio of people who settle, cheat on their married couple, divorce and unhappy marriages. Because, once you are a couple and make a commitment, in comparison to Asia.
What I find is that, in comparison to the west, single Asians men are more as a womanizer (although guys from China, only date Chinese girls) and Asian women are more as a men eater. And are more likely to date multiple people at once or while dating somebody exclusively, still going out with other romantic potentials as just friends. It might seem pretty sleazy to western people. But the fact is, in Asia, just because 2 people are dating, it does not mean u are dating exclusively, a couple or in a committed relationship, it is only so, when u agree to do so. And if u 2 are not a couple or in a committed relationship, it is alright to look around and go out with other romantic potentials as just friend and if u didn't agree for it to be exclusive, it is even OK to date other people, at the same time. And it is better then the couple/committed relationship at first sight, dating culture of the western world. For example just because u two are dating,
1. does not mean he/she is the right person for u,
2. does not mean he/she is truly the love of ur life (he/she might be somebody else, e.g. a friend)
and if somebody try steal boy friend/girl friend, when they are a couple/committed relationship that is not very nice, but if they are just dating but not a couple or in a committed relationship, it is 110% ethically OK. and dumping ur BF/GF for somebody when u are a couple/committed relationship that is really no different as to, leaving ur husband or wife for another, not cool, but if u are neither couple/committed, just dating, then, no ethical problem.
Your right that is what I do at young healthy vegan 67. Feel in 20's . I enjoy it even travel. So many other woman to meet and places to see. Enjoy life ladies. If you do you do if you don't you don't meet. The older men even men in 40's are unable to walk or are healthy.
This is pretty interesting to me! I'm only 17 years old and since I'm 14 always the 25-30 year old guys liked me... tho 14 was actually a time where I wasn't interested in a relationship, I now am and it seems as if this doesn't really change. I really hope that if I follow your tips it does so!
The more you try to cover something, the more attention it gets. Most of us are likely to take a few secrets to the grave because revealing them could be fatal. For instance if Coca Cola told everyone about its secret ingredient, it wouldn’t be the world’s no. 1 soft drink. But secrets become mysteries after a certain period of time and we can’t help but ponder over them. So here we are bringing you the 10 world’s biggest secrets of all time:
Perhaps, this is notably the most highly protected information in the world. The nuclear facilities by themselves are a secret and only specific people know where they are located. The nuclear launch codes are the most secretive information of the U.S. government, such that only top officials in the U.S. department of defense have access to these codes. The amount of nuclear weapons and the type of nuclear weapon that USA possesses remain undisclosed to the public. The public will never get to know of the nuclear information.